Production Line-Standby Mode

Another confession to make..

Selain dr tak boleh menolak mknan, aku ada satu lg penyakit yg baru dikesan iaitu pantang mendengar org mengandung dimana akan segeralah perasaan nak mengandungkan diri dtg meluap2..haaah..another series of mental storykan?

Aku noticed aku berperangai camni start masa close friend aku Nonie conceived her 2nd child dimana anak sulung dia baru jer berumur 7bln (yer mmg productive orgnya)-dan semlm lps baca blog noha psl cerita suspen ngandung dia terus rasa nak mengandung jugak (boleh pulak to be continued yer noha)-ni standard feeling utk semua ibu ataupun aku jer sorang2 syok sendiri ni?-the weird thing is perasaan ni hanya akan ada bila ppl that i know well is getting pregnant,feeling meluap2 tu akan segera dtg dan mesti berperasaan spt “alamak tak boleh jadik ni,nonie anak nak masuk dua dah pdhal dia kawen lmbt dr aku” or ‘pot umur sebaya aku tp anak dah 3,pasni dia besarkan anak jer takyah piker nak beranak lg,aku ni hah baru terkial2 kuarkan sorang” hah ni lah antara pemikiran2 dan ayat typical yg akan slalu aku ckp bila kwn2 or sedara mara mengandung.

Jealous?cemburu ke aku ni bila org lain ngandung?i think that’s not the reason behind it,it’s not an issue of jealous ke atau nak berlawan2 atau nak meriak ‘yer aku productive dan subur sbb tu aku mengandung lagi’ no,it’s not like that..it just that kwn2 yg mengandung ni mcm bg aku semangat and desire to get pregnant again after such a long time aku ngeri bila fikir bab menambah anak. For me melahir dan membesarkan anak bukan senang. Even now ni pun bila memikirkan nak mengandung lagi aku mcm trauma dan takut-bukan apa,the whole pregnancy process was aint easy for me; loya and muntah tahap dewa during early stage, kaki meng’untut’ during my trimester period , the giving birth process yg menyakitkan and even during confinement period ,nothing went smooth and easy for me masa berpantang;dgn kesakitan perut yg di lapah, kena hadap pulak both kaki yg develop allergic against epidural yg mana kegatalan adalah maksimum serta bintat2 huduh yg bertompok kehitaman, my breast swollen, constipation yg sgt menyeksa di mana masih ingat menangis tersedu2 didlm toilet sambil memkn oren dan biskut mcvitees, dan irina yg sgtlah berperangai demanding;tak tido mlm, nak melekap kat breast je, nak berdukung dan menangis suara giler kuat dah mcm tertelan mikrofon -all these things yg buat aku mcm taknak ngandung lagi dan pernah terpikir cukupla kot ni jer seketul anak aku, senang je aku kan?

Tapi tu dulu..now ni irina is about to become 2yrs old in 2 mth time, dah besar dah, dah pandai berkawan, dah pandai taknak balik bila seronok bermain, dah sng la skit nak handle compared masa kecik2 dulu hah then tgk dia start main n ckp sorang2 terus berdetik ‘kalau ada adik bagus ni, takde la asik berckp ngan patung jer’, so semangat nak beranak tu dtg blk-selain dr pengaruh rakan2, faktor2 pendorong sampingan lak bila fikir parut bedah ni I think dah heal sepenuhnya, dan bayangan sakit nak beranak pun dah ala2 kelam dan aku dah ready utk membuyungkan diri sekali lagi,tapi sebenarnya one big factor yg mempengaruhi ialah my age,I’ll be 30 next year dan anak aku baru sorang-masa ni teringatla mak ckp ‘mak dulu umur 31thn beranakkan adik anak yg ke-5’,hoh!bolehla mak kawen abah umur 19thn,aku 19thn mengelinjang lg mcm budak2,celahmananya anak 5 by age 30!

tp betul apa mak ckp, masa muda2 ni la start buat anak,besarkan family, then dah hit target (giler la ayat sales report) u stop beranak then u besarkan anak2 u serentak, takyah piker nak ngandung lg. Compared to u jarak2kan kelahiran anak let say 6-7years then u pregnant,hah mmg bestla anak sulung dah besarkan tp masa tu umur u pun dah meningkat,tenaga tak kuat, u pun dah kekok lama tak jaga baby and u rugi masa..masa ni lah u nyesal tgk kawan2 lain anak dah besar sng nak handle u still lg bergelumang ng baby kecik.. hah that’s my mom’s point or I believe ramai org2 tua pun berpendapat sedemikian rupa which for me is, yeah it’s true,ada point di situ-tp kena consider gak faktor2 lain kan esp fiancial situation,bukan main boh jer beranak smpi seplaton kluar end up anak terbiar,takleh gak..

Aku dulu pernah plan nak 2nd baby bila irina umur 5thn,mcm2la konon plan;nak sambung study dulu la, nak stablekan my career la, nak bisnes mak andam la,nak itu nak ini mcm2la plan poyo akukan,tp pikir2 blk umur aku bkn sentiasa muda, umur aku bkn boleh tunggu plan2 poyo ni direalitikan, aku kejar yg ni keciciran bab lain plak, u gain some, u lost some,u just cant have everything goes perfectly as per your plan and schedule, this is part of game in lifekan-sooo..what’s next?no no not to get laid now and shoot it out accurately(haha!), aku rasa dah tiba masanya aku stop mkn contraceptive pills dan berangan apa2 nama yg boleh rhyme dgn nama iman irina, okkan?

telmon@montel = rectangular

Aku terasa diri ini semakin telmon sejak share keta ng hubby-apa kaitan kereta dan telmon?

yer ada kaitannya.

Skang ni sejak pegi opis bersama2,slalu kitaorg breakfast dulu, breakfast lak kat mamak,hah apa lagi pagi2 asikla roti canai, nasik lemak,roti canai nasik lemak..tu je la kitarannya..kalau dulu masa drive sendiri, beli je kuih karipap kat tepi opis or gi 7-eleven beli sosej bun then pekena milo semug,kautim, then tghari baru pekena nasi campur-kedengarannya spt pola pemakanan yg sihatkan?tp skang corak pemknan adalah mengerikan,imagine this;skang ni pagi2 nasik lemak telur mata sebungkus ataupun roti canai garing dimkn bersama kuah kari+dal disulam Nescafe tarik, slps itu perasaan standard adalah akan terasa menyesal dan berslh apabila mknan kembang dlm perut dan seluar tetiba menyendat lalu terus memplankan diri utk memakan roti shj masa lunch lantas terus membeli roti. Tapi apa yg mengerikan dan merisaukan ialah apabila tidak dpt menolak ajakan rakan2 opis utk lunch nasik campur yg mana sentiasa akan mengunung penuh dlm pinggan. Nasik penuh, kuah2 bersantan adalah mesti (lemak nangka,kari daging, lemak pucuk paku) then then pekena air teh ais lak-sumenya lemak berkrim je kan?hah apa cite roti tadi? kul 4-5ptg kang baham roti tu lak, teruk tak teruk?

aku rasa aku mempunyai masalah menolak ajakan org kalau bab2 mkn ni,atau lebih tepat lg aku susah nak resist makanan,I love to eat and I eat a lot. Masalahnya skang ni metabolisme rate aku tak mcm dulu2, aku notice skang a bit change in my eating style lead to a drastic change in my bodyshaping, esp perut ng lengan, gile la perut aku skang dah boleh genggam ngan tarik (keji tak keji cite perihal perut sendiri kat internet heheh)-dulu2 masa zaman student kalau aku mkn the same portion mcm skang,serius takde effect, malahan lantakan aku adalah melampau dimana kul 2-3 pagi pun aku boleh mkn nasik lemak ayam rempah kat bangsar tanpa perasaan takut atau berslh ,skang ni cuba try tgk,harus aku membelon.

Aku rasa aku tau reasonnya;besides masa tu muda belia lg dimana metabolisme rate adalah tinggi, kehidupan student aku pun turut memberi impact gak. Yela,masa tu mana ada naik keta ke hulu ke hilir cam skang, zaman menapak beb,turun naik bas panjat bukit uitm tu,fuhh betul2 letih, energy burnt dah sama mcm berlari 10km, tu yg aku mkn byk pun no hal berat stil 46kg,n masa tu mmg aku kena mkn byk pun sbb tenaga yg aku perlukan utk menapak sama spt tenaga yg dikeluarkan oleh seorg buruh kasar buat bangunan. Sama lah jugak masa aku baru2 keje,takde keta masa tu,turun naik bas metro,berdiri bersendat2 dlm bas pastu turun kena jln lg bout 1km baru smpi opis,tu tak kira lg kalau aku membuat larian marathon nak kejar bas-even my life kind of hard that time,tp aku happy sbb aku kurus dan slim(perasan tak abis2) dan tetiba skang ni aku rindu zaman2 menapak aku,it’s actually an exercise for me, bdn masa tu ringan je, peluh slalu je kuar sihat tau kehidupan, skang ni nak berpeluh?ala, certain2 ‘occasion’ aje la heheh

sooo..in conclusion,aku mesti kawal cara mknan aku dimana aku nak kurangkan carbo and santan2, exercise?hmm hayun penyapu kemas rumah sume kira exercise gak tu kan? and yg paling penting aku taknak jadik ‘alam flora’ lg dimana kalau ada mknan2 yg tak habis aku mesti nak habiskan.hah ni satu lg penyaki,t apsal ntah aku ni, terasa mcm berslh kalau ada leftover,kang mula la perut dah sengkak pun aku paksa abiskan gak sbb terasa syg nak buang mknan. Hubby pun satu (tetiba mencari mangsa utk diperslhkan),slalu kalau ada mknan tak abis suruh aku abiskan,tak membantu lnsgkan?dah tak membantu tu satu hal,pastu memberi comment yg sgt destructive tu yg aku tak thn tu:

Me :tell me frankly, jujur sejujurnya, my body ada shape lg tak?
Mr R.A : ada,ada (nodding frantically without having a glance at me)
Me :betul ke ni ada shape?
Mr R.A : betul ada, shape segi empat tepat
Me :abaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaang!!!
Mr R.A : laaaa,tu shape gak tu kan

Tell me now, membantu tak membantu?tp yg pasti sgt jujur orangnya kan :P

irina's zone

I haven't blog bout Irina for quite sometimes, so what she's up to now?

For a toddler who's about to become two years old in two months time, she's progressing verrry well..active, naughty and sometimes manja and mengada-she's also a fast learner, like to immitate whatever mommy and abah said hence we dont dare to say bad things in front of her bocz she'll pick up the word fast and say it back to our face, terrer heh?

besides that, she's still in deep obsession with mr barney whereby she already has a few of barney's collection as an option to watch. This mean she has more time to spend with barney and we have less or shall i quote no time at all for buletin utama or any hbo movie or even iklan tv huhu..and i also noticed she enjoys watching animal planet juga dimana kalau aku terasa spt vcd player tu hampir nak meletop kepanasan,i'll switch to animal planet and dia akan terpaku dpn tv sambil bertanya.."mommy,apa ku,apa ku" (apa tu) haah letih la plak nak melayan soalan2 kan,tp takpe janji dia duduk diam.

Hah,part yg ni best, irina is now able to pronounce her own name as well as mommy's and abah's name quite precisely haha!it's not only that, tokbak's, tokmak's, grandma and grandpa's name too are in the list, so here it goes:

what is your abah's name?yano ayiss
what is your mommy's name?ma fu hah
what is your name?iman iyina
what is your tokbak's name?oomai
what is your tokmak's name?za ie ta
what is your grandma's name?naa fii hah
what is your grandpa's name?muu syaa

haha!cute sgt bunyi!and she also knows our cat's name kat kg, she will shout Yassyerrr (Yasser) or Bojo (Bozo) everytimes she saw them-who else that she calls by name?hah Aishah and Farah, her two friends at nursery, she will always said 'bye-bye fawah' or 'bye-bye aisyah' when we fetch her..hmmm..terasa anak dah membesar..

whatelse?hah..recently we find out that irina develops interest to be like a kakak apabila bersama babybear nya, ehe,lain mcmkan bunyi?mcm tak sabar2 la plak nak jadik seorg kakak,ni yg gerun ni..her favourite time now is 'feeding' her 'anak2' ataupun menidurkan babybear sambil menepuk2 babybear tu hihi berangan..berangan..ok enough said, just see the pic:

mula-mula menyusun 'anak-anak', pinggan dgn sudu standby tepi..

get ready utk menyuap..

"aaaaaauummmm"...mamam time..

haha..sooo girlish rite? anak pompuan...

Mari membuat azam

Happy New Year All!

Bye-bye 2006 and welcome 2007,may this year brings a lots of good things,happiness and barakah to all of us all the way towards the end..insyaAllah..Tutup diary 2006…segala kebaikan jadikan pedoman,segala keburukan di jadikan sempadan (betul ke ayat aku ni)-ok jap, nak tgk blk apa azam yg aku tulis kat blog ni masa new year 2006 sethn lepas..

but one thing for sure I really look forward to have a career advancement (dpt jawatan MD pun jadik la citt poorah berangan!), and to further my study is the main thing I would like to do/pursue EVERY year..yer..tiap2 thn ada azam ni..resolution 2 thn lps yg tak terlaksana lagi..mcmana nak terlaksana? 2 thn lps sibuk prepare kawin, tak sempat buat apa dah terberanak, so maybe this year?we’ll see..and of course to be a better wife and mommy to Mr R.A and to my baby..so go mommy go!i know u can do it!

Hmmmmm….

Malu nak komen..tp sbb dah ter’copy-paste’ kat sini kan,so komen je la sambil meng’cover’ malu ehe-ok meh sini nak evaluate:

-career advancement: huhu..huhuhuhuhuhuhuhhuhuhuhuhu…(ni jer expression yg aku mampu bg..)

-further study: nnti jap nak check ada tak nama aku daftar kat mana2 institusi pengajian tinggi kat m’sia ni..ada?takda??thn lps takde, thn ni pun takde, resolution jenis apakah ini?sungguh memalukan kamu ini

hah! Yg ni confident skit nak ckp!heheh

-to be a better wife to Mr R.A and a be good mommy to iman irina wohooo!I already am, rite hubby?i’m the bestest wife kan?my cook bestkan?i pandai kemas rumahkan?i’m a good mommy kan?i pandai jaga irinakan?i’m good at making you laugh kan?and good at giving u ehem ehem EHHEMMM kan kan?hahaha!

so..that’s all of my achievement for last year,sedih tak sedih?hihi-but I think to be a better person is the best resolution of all, better than any other things to aim in life-to become better compared to last year and much much better for the upcoming year haaaa, ok kan?just imagine this, u have plenty of money, a good rank in society, higher position, generate lots and lots of assets dan memiliki segala mak bapak harta di dunia ini but..u are sucks as in person, everybody hates you and ppl keeps on cursing and talking bad bout you..tak guna jugakkan?and utk menambahkan lagi kesadisan situation ini ialah bila u never gain happiness in your life, hati tak pernah tenang, jiwa tak sentosa even duit berkepok2..haha..pathetickan?

and tetiba aku terpikir,adakah aku berckp sume ni sbb aku nak sedapkan hati sendiri di mana aku tak mencapai apa2 yg membanggakan pun in terms of material sepjg thn lps? No career advancement(yess,masih ditakuk lama), fail to further-up my study,I have no extra money to buy luxury things, I have no car, no assets, we are still renting a house..yupp, my life is not as luxurious compared to my other frens,I tak tukar brg kemas setiap kali raya, tak tukar kereta every year ..bla bla..

but..but..truly i’m a happy person..i’m a happy momma to my beloved iman irina, a happy wife to my hubby, a good (daughter to my wonderful parents and a happy retard sistah to my other siblings -I love what I have right now, to have a great and superb family and a bunch of wonderful ppl to be called friends n I feel fully gratified for this blessing given by Him, alhamdulillah,tp takla pulak aku menidakkan kepentingan material dan pangkat, it just that kalau ada alhamdulillah rezeki, kalau takde teruskanlah berusaha

..soooo..azam thn ni pulak?eheh,azam yg besar n dasyat2 tu taknak la ckp kat sini,kang aku poyo thn dpn termalu lagi,hah ni azam yg kecik2 jer,boleh?

-nak hilangkan babat kat perut
-cellulite-free
-pimple-free (akan dapatkah kulit yg flawless itu?)
-nak kurangkan melantak
-nak kurangkan ckp2 mengarut
-nak menjadik seorg yg cool,tak cpt melenting dan marah
-nak kurangkan tahap kerabakkan ketawa (boleh ke ni?)

Happy new year again, strive hard for the best!(poyo gile ayat)